A good road map, and Manos would never have happened. Michael (played by the multi-talentless Warren) is out vacationing with his squirrely wife, whiny daughter, and pet poodle Peppy when he takes a wrong turn and ends up at a dilapidated dark house. The caretaker, Torgo, hesitantly comes to their aid, but not before showing off more tics than a boatload of method actors. Eventually, they wind up witnessing the bizarre rituals of Manos in his backyard temple, a stretch of scrub desert with chintzy pillars and a sacrificial slab. The presence of the outsiders disrupts Manos's cult, which consists of five pudgy women in diaphanous gowns. Hand scorching, snarling dobermans, high priestess cat-fights, and the evil eye-the rewards for poor country navigation. Believe it or not, this legendary movie was actually made by a fertilizer salesman from El Paso.